It’s crazy to think that this Saturday, 2 days from now, I will be on my way to Rainsville, Alabama for orientation and then only next week I will be off to Mexico for the summer. Needless to say, I am a bit overwhelmed.
I’ve never in my life been the type of person to worry or be so fearful of the unknown until this week. Anyone who knows me would most be likely to describe me as “chill”, “easy-going”, or even “laid back” so for me to feel fearful makes me feel even more out of place. However, this is a big task. To commit two whole months in another country, away from family and friends, with people I’ve never met before, and on top of that not being certain of what you’ll be doing day to day or how the people of that culture interact is a tad bit scary.The unknown has certainly become forefront in my mind and I think I’ve recently allowed the enemy to put me in a place of doubt. I have felt that lack of control because so much is unknown and I’ve even doubted my ability to serve and the work that God can do.
But when I’m upset and worrisome, God reassures me that none of this is about me. It’s all for Him. I’m not going to Mexico to have others see me as righteous, and I’m not going simply to say I won however many lives to Christ. I’m going so that my Savior, the Creator of this world, may be glorified. So that His work may be fulfilled in the hearts of his people. I’ve simply answered a call; this adventure that I shall soon embark upon has absolutely nothing to do with me for it’s entirely the work of the Lord. Thus, I was encouraged tonight when a former missionary from my church reminded me of this verse.
“So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
What an appropriate verse for the emotions and thoughts that have currently flooded my mind. The Lord shall provide and I have nothing of which to be fearful. I am confident that my God will move this summer and I know that it will be challenging. But I rest assured in the fact that it’s not about me. I pray, and ask that you all would pray with me, that I may not become distracted by my desires or needs in selfishness but that I be in tune with the Word of the Lord and that his will be done. I pray that all my work be done only to point back to God above.